One of the posts that is most frequently read on my blog is A Parenting Moment: Eight Ways to Deal with Anger as a Parent. Hundreds, sometimes thousands of people check it out every day.
If you subscribe to our monthly Toddler Approved Newsletter, then you know that this month one of the things I am working on to help keep any frustration in check is to focus on the simple and sweet moments that I discover in each day.
This week some of the sweet moments included...
- Watching my son and husband dress up in their nerf gear and duke it out running around the house zapping each other (so funny)
- Shopping alone (and I'm not talking about grocery shopping)... and I getting a yummy frosting filled Mrs. Fields cookie as my treat while I roamed the mall
- Dressing up in new costumes courtesy of Melissa & Doug and making silly faces
- Seeing my son give a special train picture to his sister that he made for her at camp... and just watching her beam!
- Sweating in the heat at Gilroy Gardens while the kids rode together on rides, slurped icees, and chased each other around.
- Making a back to School Brag Board with my son and having morning learning time with him each day before my daughter woke up.
In addition to my tip to focus on the good in each day, I loved this great advice from some of our readers regarding other ways to deal with anger as a parent...
- One thing I have found that really helps me is to stop and think to myself before I act, that she is still a baby, and one day she will not be. As much whining as she is doing now, or how clingy she is when I have to finish my work, she will not want to do this in a few years. I will not be able to pick her up and carry her like I can now. I have to cherish these times with her, when I can hold her and cuddle her. It really does help, I know I will miss these little frustrating moments one day! - AB
- A couple of weeks ago I found a book for kids called 'Sometimes I feel Angry' at a yard sale, I'm guessing Amazon or somewhere should stock it. My daughter enjoys the book and it gives suggestions about positive ways to deal with anger. We both apply them, they work for me as well as for her! It helped me a lot to think of things from a 4 year old perspective. One thing (not from the book) that I am finding often works is to do something absolutely silly to break the tension. For my daughter that is getting on my bed and running on the spot as fast as she can while I do the same on the floor next to the bed. We have a race. Rather than time outs, we have time ins, where we stop and cuddle on the sofa or bed with a book. - Anonymous
- Take inventory of your kids for a few days. Know there good times and bad. Don't put your kids in a situation were they are bound to get into trouble. Like the grocery store during nap time. - Anonymous
- When I feel like I'm going to lose it, I start doing jumping jacks or jumping around like Richard Simmons. I'll even pull out a wooden spoon and start belting out songs. The kids are usually so surprised, they forget what they were doing and start laughing. It gives me a chance to chill out my emotions, get exercise and see my kids laugh. I only do this in desperate situations, but it seems to work. -Anonymous
- Lately, I have found the most important thing above all is to just take time to love and cherish my kids. If I feel like I'm getting frustrated and my fuse is growing short, I take a look at each one of them in a different light. As my own flesh and blood who are so tiny and new, so full of wonder and learning and changing so much everyday. And I think about how these days will soon be over. Then I tell them how much I love them, tell them all the things they are doing RIGHT, then I squeeze them as hard as possible without hurting them and smother them with kisses! They are so precious and once I take a step back and think about that, that hug can add feet back to my fuse! And then I think of something fun to do that we don't do often, like having a picnic snack and story time on our family room floor, a craft, an experiment, or something like that. Something to change up our day and give us a fresh new attitude. - Meghan
My friend Alissa over at Creative with Kids has been doing a wonderful series on her blog this week around this topic... so I highly recommend you check it out. She also has a pinterest board full of resources on parenting a spirited child if you have one of those at your house. I definitely do on some days! 😉
At the end of a long day, how do you resist the urge to throw a parent tantrum?
Can I be honest with you? Sometimes it actually feels good to have an emotional meltdown... Does anyone else feel that way?
I definitely think parenting is something that we have to take a day at a time... and we need to give ourselves a break and recognize that we are trying our best.
Take good care of yourself this weekend and if you have a second, stop by and share a link related to something fun you did this week or share a sweet and simple moment from your week in the comments.
I would love to hear about the sweet moments in your life!
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One of my sweetest moments this week was listening to my 4 year old teaching his 2 year old sister the alphabet.
Thanks for this great post. I really needed those tips on anger!
I totally forgot about the co-op, so I thought I'd join in late. Thanks for hosting!